Was feeling a bit left out by all the smart and daring people putting forth their forecasts for the coming year, so I decided to join the party. While most people are afraid of being wrong; we, at MuckerLab, are not afraid of being right. In no particular order, here are MuckerLab’s fearless predictions for 2012:
1. Mark Zuckerberg decides to bail out Greece, Spain, and Italy to ensure the Facebook IPO goes out smoothly
2. Economy stalls, forcing brogrammers to start applying to MBA schools – creating a whole new specie called “Brogrammers who wear pants”
3. No one will ever confuse an “accelerator” for an “incubator” again, just like no one ever type “www” to the beginning of his or her urls anymore.
4. Gamification finally hits enterprise software: SAP launches gamification module for SAP ERP HCM which allows companies to match employee 401K contributions with badges instead of money.
5. Big Data crushes Small Data. (No Data announces retirement)
6. Consolidation in the Los Angeles accelerator market will create an 800 pound gorilla called AmpedUpEngineMuckPad.La which will create a formidable competitor to YCombinator . . . and bring balance to the Force.
7. The mythical yet imminent “Series A Crunch” will spawn an evil twin called the “Series B Crunch” – to which, we’ll all just finally admit getting other people to part with their money is just plain hard . . . with or without a “crunch.”
8. YouTube video marketshare will continue to grow unabated, causing the media industry to call for “online video distribution neutrality.” Google responds by buying Clearwire for pennies on the dollar and stealing DirecTV from the lustful eyes of AT&T.
9. Twitter breaks $150M in revenue. (and $50B in secondary market valuation)
10. “Silicon Beach” will fall into the ocean and thus ending the Series A hopes of 199 subscription mobile e-commerce social app startups and one optical networking equipment company.